things have been coming along okay. i'm still really confused about everything in life. i don't understand guys. i want to find someone who wants exactly what i want. what is that exactly? i have no idea. i just want to have fun and be happy. what happens when you find the perfect guy that makes all your dreams a reality, and then you find out that he doesn't want the same things you do. he just wants to be free to do whatever. he doesn't want a "serious" relationship. what is that about? how do you define "serious"? what's so wrong with being "serious"? why do people seem to push away the people who love them the most? he could have told me about his fear of seriousness 6 months ago, before things got to that point. how do you turn away from someone you love who doesn't feel the same way? i guess nothing lasts forever. i have yet to learn that.